Pizza
Make Your Own Pizza
Create your own pizza! Simply type in the toppings you want in the SPECIAL REQUEST section and we'll make sure you're taken care of. Yes, you can add as many of our topping choices as you want... you’re allowed to ruin your own damn pizza. What?! We're not your dad!
$32.00
Mortician Pizza
Long live the new flesh! Hesher's all meat pizza that'll satisfy that lust for flesh. Generous amounts of pepperoni, sausage, and bacon while each slice is garnished with the finest, thinnest slices of prosciutto.
$27.00
Cheese Master Pizza
The gold standard of pizzas. This one is simple: a special Hesher blend of real good cheese that tastes good... if you wanted a bunch of buzzword bullshit to describe it, you’re in the wrong place, bud.
$27.00
Coffins Choice Pizza
Arguably, one of the greatest topping combinations to die for jalapenos, pepperoni, garlic, bacon, and pineapple. Death, that sweet spice of life!
$27.00
The Insert Credit Pizza
Show me a hesher and I’ll show you their copy of NHLPA Hockey ‘93 for the Sega Genesis. Hesher’s is proud to be in league with the legendary Oakland based game forum INSERT CREDIT by offering their pizza: sliced black olives, garlic, and vegan sausage on top of a 4-cheese medley. *MARIO COIN NOISE*
$27.00
Altars of Madness Pizza
The altar is not to be approached frivolously. This is a butthole rodeo! Cherry pepper, banana pepper, jalapeno, habanero, and serrano peppers, juiced up with maraschino cherries for the ritual is bittersweet. This hot af, maniacs!
$27.00
Hesh Law Pizza
We’re laying down the law with garlic, onion, basil, pepperoni, sausage, kalamata olives, mushrooms, and serrano peppers to crush all enemies and reign supreme over all supremes. Let us know if you want habanero peppers on there. We ‘ll sub’em for the serranos, polecat. THE ZA IS THE LAW! HESH LAW!
$27.00
Meat Fungus Pizza
Straightforward solid combo of homegrown sausage and fresh mushrooms. For this, we make an exception. Add one other topping. No extra charge. Thrash!
$22.00
Fantasy Lane - BAND PIZZA 1
A lane of pepperoni runs down the center surrounded by cashew gravel (nuts), giving way to green jalapenos near the crust. And, a side of booger sugar (parm). Ride the snake! A portion of the sales of this signature pizza go directly to the band because - baby - life on the road, playing music ain’t easy. Every little bit helps.
$30.00
The False Pizza
It looks like cheese, tastes like sausage, and smells like pizza... But! It's vegan: vegan cheese, vegan sausage, mushroom, and garlic, finished with tasty basil! Now, name five of their songs! - We are currently out of vegan cheese!!!
$27.00
Pepperoni Pizza
The old standby. At least 25 pepperonis blanketed and crisped to bring you into pizza Valhalla. All you need now is a beer, doofus!
$22.00
MOLTEN - BAND PIZZA 2
Meet the delicious bowel shaking insanity of garlic, basil, bleu cheese, habanero, and mushroom - all drizzled with hot-honey. This thing will melt your tastebuds, bud! Add sausage at no cost if you tryin’ to get real crazy, ese.
$27.00
Maquahuitl Pizza
Hesher's signature pizza. Diced onion, corn, cherry tomato, and serrano peppers finished with cotija, cilantro, and tajin. Squirt that lime on there, dude. It's time to swing that Aztec sword!
$27.00
MUTATE - BAND PIZZA 4
PEPPERONI, GARLIC, ONION, SAUSAGE, BLACK OLIVES, STUFFED CRUST Let us know if you want HABANEROS added to it!
$30.00
The Zorba Pizza
Another signature Hesher's za. This is a Greek-styled pizza from the labyrinths of create topped with feta cheese, garlic, thin slices of tomato, Kalamata olives, pine nuts, and basil. ya mas!
$27.00
RUDE - BAND PIZZA 3
From the numbing outer reaches of space blasts a RUDE pizza the likes of which this galaxy has never seen. BEHOLD! Pineapple and vegan chorizo float among the wreckage of Szechuan peppercorns to (literally) numb the tongue and stupify the brain!
$30.00
Canadian Tuxedo Pizza
This pizza is why you're here, another Hesher's signature za. You've got blueberries, bleu cheese, and bacon that together provide an insanely indescribable flavor. Long live the Canadian Tuxedo! Rip Cliff.
$27.00
BEFOWLMENT
Hesher's BUFFALO CHICKEN pizza. This total slab is frankensteined together with chunks of IMPOSSIBLE CHICKEN, LITE BLEU CHEESE, ONION, GARLIC, and PINEAPPLE in the warm glow of our own Hesher's buffalo sauce. Bone Apel Tit, good buddy!
$27.00
Tombmold Pizza
Fresh mushrooms, jalapenos, and Kalamata olives finished with basil. Provide +6 XP, +2 mana, but yields poison effect. Spicy!
$27.00